Q: I don't think you've actually announced your female name at work yet (I have been away for a couple of days, so maybe I missed it).  I don't want to call you Leann without everyone else knowing about your name change, I somehow think that would make people uncomfortable (and I know you are taking great pains to make everyone as comfortable as possible), but I do feel funny about calling you by your male name knowing that it is not the "real you".  I think I end up NOT refering to you as a name, and then I think myself rude for that.  Though I will undoubtedly make a mistake in pronoun or name at certain times, I really would like to refer to you as "Leann" now.  I also think it will help people (well, me anyway) fully adjust and move past the transition quicker and focus on who you really are.  Do you have a timeline for announcing "Leann" to work and having us start to refer to you by that name?

A:  Don't worry about using my old name.  Heck, I still have to use it.  I'm not thrilled with having to perpetuate the use of it now, but I need to be patient and just work my plan.   So don't think yourself rude. 

Yes, I do have a 'switch' date in mind - November 7th.  Yes, it is awkward right now, and if going by 2 different names isn't enough, I also go by 2 genders!  While everyone at work is aware, not all vendors or clients would know, and I do feel I'd like to be further along before we just go completely 'Leann'.  Also, many people are still adjusting and I think it fair to give them time to see a bit of transition along the way.  I'll never please everyone, but I'll feel better knowing I've given them a chance to adjust and this goes for coworkers as well as family & friends.

So for now, we still use the old name at work, and we'll continue that until November.   If you're just talking to me, it's probably Ok to use Leann.   But if you're talking to other people at work, it's best to keep up the guy name.   We've never done this kind of thing before, so it's hard to know what's the best path & policy for handling it.  I suppose this may change, and everyone just calls me 'Leann' even before November.  We'll see.

And of course, the 'official' change over is November because that's the day I'll return to work after having my FFS work!  No looking back at that point.